In my observations of people through the years, I’ve been at the table with stubborn people and determined people.
Most of us think of stubborn people as difficult, closed-minded, and often angry individuals. We see them as challengers of the common good. We sigh a lot when they are assigned to our team.
On the other hand, the view of determined folks can be quite the opposite. Determined people live according to their purpose. They like to think about where they’re going and how they are going to get there.
The stubborn also consider their goals and their path to success. Unlike determined people they tend to fixate on the path — their method of moving forward. That focus can override reason and eventually lead to losing sight of their goal. While they may eventually get where they wanted to go, it’s often at the expense of relationships and resources.
For a determined person, the purpose — the ultimate goal — is always clearly in view. Although committed to their course, they never hesitate to reconsider their next steps. Their flexibility in choosing their path not only allows them to navigate difficulties well, it provides one additional advantage over the stubborn: It allows them to continuously evaluate their purpose.
What the stubborn person misses are the opportunities for achieving more refined purposes. Their refusal to change their attitudes or positions may win the day. But there will be other days. And the odds of winning at a game where your only move is stubbornness are pretty slim overall.
In looking at common uses of the two words, “stubborn” and “determined,” I also see a high occurrence of “stubborn determination.”
Stubborn determination is the driving force behind successful leaders. Their emphasis is on their purpose. Always. The direct result of that is an individual who remains open to discussion and is intensely interested in what may (or may not) help them achieve their purpose. They are clear in communication and direction, yet constantly curious about all of the possibilities. And open to useful change and innovation.
With that richness of input, the stubbornly determined can become champions of the common good. And the more people you can find to share your view of the common good, the more momentum and success you will experience.
Determination and stubborn deliberation are levels of intensity toward community. Come on now. Don’t be merely stubborn.
As always, insightful thoughts that challenge the mind and stir the heart. Thank you, Dr. Cope.
And so often stubborn people share your same goal and value. The relationships might trip over method and timeline but not passion.